The Marie Reed Field Address

Four weeks and five days ago our fathers brought forth upon this division a new team, conceived in kickball goodness and dedicated to the proposition that no other team was created equal.
Now we are engaged in a great war, testing whether that team, or any team so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We will meet on a great community center battlefield of that war. We will meet to dedicate a portion of it as the final resting place of those balls that gave their last air that the team might kick other big red balls. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this.
But in a larger sense, we cannot dedicate, we cannot consecrate, we cannot hallow the ground at Marie Reed. The brave men and women, kicking and fielding, who struggled here last week, have consecrated it far above out poor power to add or detract.
The world will little note, nor long remember, what I write here, but it can never forget what we will do at Marie Reed. It is for us, the first balls, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work that we have thus far so nobly begun. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us, that from these honored losses we take increased devotion to that cause for which we gave last week's full measure of devotion; that we here highly resolve that these losses shall not have occurred in vain; that the team shall, under influence of alcoholic beverages, have a new birth of ability, and that a WAKA of the first balls, by the first balls, for the first balls, shall not perish from the District.****

FIRSTBALLS!!!!!

****Modeled after the ending of Bill and Ted's Excellent adventure, which I hear was modeled after something a president once said at some battefield somewhere.